I felt like a kid in a pet store asking, “Can we please have him?” “No, we should really wait till we get settled”, he replied. I nodded and finally agreed that it was best that we wait. The following day while sitting in my office my boyfriend said he’s going to meet me at my office when he gets off. I thought it was strange but said okay. My boyfriend and our roommate showed up at my office and in walks our new puppy, Gavin. Turns out he could not resist and went back to pick up the puppy the next day.

Three months later one Sunday night, I’m sitting on the couch with Gavin and my computer in my lap. My boyfriend was attending his weekly fraternity meeting and it was my time to be with the puppy, watch my favorite shows, and prepare myself for the following week. During this time, MySpace was just becoming popular and we could change the backgrounds. I decided that considering I had spare time I would change the look of my MySpace page. I had previously saved a photo that I planned on using as my background somewhere on my computer, but I could not remember where I put it. On my Mac in Spotlight I began to type MySpace. “my” suddenly showed “mykeys”. “mykeys” was my boyfriends ex’s screen name. I did not think they spoke anymore or so he stated. Of course when you stumble across something like this your curiosity peaks. Opening the saved chat transcripts my heart began to race. I could feel the tears swelling in my eyes as I read, “I had a dream last night that I was having sex with you on the kitchen counter like we did last week.” I quickly shut my computer and began crying. My worst fear had been confirmed. The first boy I opened my heart to had been cheating on me with his ex.

As I kissed Gavin goodbye for the last time I said, “I love you, but Daddy will not be able to see you again”. I guess he was right. We should have waited until we were more “settled.”