“Milk” was what inspired me to create “I’m From Driftwood” so meeting the film’s screenwriter, Dustin Lance Black, was both meaningful and exciting. He was kind enough to show me some artifacts that belonged to Harvey Milk, which he was soon going to donate to a museum or archive. One item was a funny hand-written note from Harvey to a local politician he had met the night before, which said something along the lines of, “Had fun last night. Not in that way! -Harvey”. Anyway, I was half expecting Dustin to talk about “Milk” or winning his Oscar but he surprised me by telling a funny but still personal and meaningful story I hadn’t previously heard from him.
As a child, Faith Cheltenham thought she was gay. As she grew older, though, she became aware that her attraction was much broader than to just one gender or identity. Faith explains:
I dated straight women who became bisexual women, I dated lesbians, I dated gay men on the side when they were in the closet as being bi which is actually not successful at all. I went through basically the entire rainbow, skittle by skittle, had a great experience but was very lost and in the sense that what I was looking for was very specific.
When you’re open to dating “the entire rainbow,” what does it take to grab Faith’s attention and heart? Turns out, a way with phones and being a bonafide geek:
One of the reasons I fell in love with my husband was understanding that my attraction was actually a lot based on geekiness. I’m a geek, that’s what I’m attracted to. I like people who are smart, I like people who are technical, who like film and television who want to sit on the couch. And all of a sudden I meet this guy, this straight guy, who wants to go out, he wants to date me, he wants to talk about his cell phone, he’s an Android cell phone developer. And I’m like, oh my god…
After falling in love with and getting married to a straight man, though, Faith had a new and unexpected set of challenges:
Here I did 10 years to come out to my family and get them adjusted to me being queer, and having a girlfriend who was transgender, having girlfriends who are women, and they’re all accustomed to it, they know it, they all know what’s happening at Thanksgiving and Christmas, but now I bring a guy home. That was terrifying for me. [...] And it wasn’t that I was bi, because I understand that I like guys, but it was just the idea that I was going to be perceived as heterosexual that was really troublesome to me.
Continue Reading to watch Faith’s story or read the transcript.
Sunny was my first true love. She was half Native American with sparkling eyes and curly sun-kissed hair. The first day of 3rd grade I saw her and fell hard. I would go out of my way to talk to her, leave notes on her desk with pieces of candy; love sick with no words to express what I was feeling. While I had no idea that I was suffering from love our teacher certainly noticed that I had an “unusual” attraction to Sunny and immediately disapproved. She assigned us seats at opposite corners of the class though everyone else was seated alphabetically. When group work was to be done I was often discouraged from working with Sunny. I found these things odd but assumed our teacher simply didn’t like me. Near the end of the school year our class was informed that Sunny was moving out of state, and wouldn’t we all like to write her a going away letter? My heart ached, ice ran through my veins at the thought that I would never see her again. So I wrote her the best love letter a confused 8-year-old could write and turned my letter in with the rest so that our teacher could type them up. The next day our teacher presented us with a pretty blue binder that she had placed our letters in and invited us all to sign our names to them before she gave it to Sunny. I searched through the binder twice for my letter then approached my teacher. “Sarah, your letter is inappropriate and will not be included with the others.” I felt tears burn my eyes. It was the first time that I realized that my teacher didn’t like me because of my love for Sunny. I went back to my seat and tried to remain invisible the rest of that year.
“Milk” was what inspired me to create “I’m From Driftwood” so meeting the film’s screenwriter, Dustin Lance Black, was both meaningful and exciting. He was kind enough to show me some artifacts that belonged to Harvey Milk, which he was soon going to donate to a museum or archive. One item was a funny hand-written [...]
´Why are you home?” she asked. “I need to talk to you.” And then came the tears. “You´re gay” she said. I confirmed her thoughts. We sat by the fireplace talking about what had taken place over the preceding months. The marriage counseling, the distance, the knowledge that something was taking place.
I didn’t think monogamy was possible. I’ve been engaged twice to men who never had a chance. Since middle school, I dated guys. I loved the attention and reveled in the stares. I dated my first boyfriend for almost 7 years, second for 3.5 years, and others along the way. It was easy. Despite the [...]